Best Political Jokes -Capitol Steps Political Satire - Current Political Jokes
Intellectual midgets and Pee Wee Herman The Congressman; Hell will freeze over before politicians can fix this economy.
The economy is in shambles. Unemployment is at an all-time high. Foreclosure has become an epidemic and we are looking to the same screw-up's who put us in this mess to get us out.
Seriously, and I say this with all due respect the handicapped and economically disadvantaged, we would have a better chance of grabbing a random homeless, blind, deaf, mute, quadriplegic out of a refrigerator box shanty in a west Philly alleyway and betting one million dollars that we could train him to win the Ironman in a week, than we ever will depending on succubus congressmen and senators to get us out of this mess of which they are responsible.
Congress will blame this meltdown on aliens and the chupacabra before they admit any wrong doing.
Turn on the news and you'll see an orgy of sweaty brow, finger-wagging and jaw-flapping politicians blaming a straw man CEO of an investment banking firm for ten years of his firm's economic gluttony and purging (though he's only been in this executive position for 90 days). It's a set up. Wake up. It's all just a distraction.
Bring in a clean cut yet power hungry executive, put him through rapid promotion from VP to CEO, tell him he's going to a press conference then blindfold him, lead him to a 3x3 ft closet, toss in a dozen stink bombs, 10 day old soiled adult diapers, bottle rockets and fire crackers, turn out the lights, take off the blindfold, throw in a rabid squirrel, slam the door shut and 5 days later let him out to and ask him to run the Boston Marathon wearing an eye patch, Speedo and flip-flops while waving pompoms. Let's get real. We need solutions, not a congressional Kid n' Play dance competition. It's a joke and we are the ones being laughed at; you, me and our children.
I have an idea! For the next presidential election we can have Pee Wee Herman run under the democratic ticket, the hunchback of notre dame can run under the republican ticket and we can have Chubaka run the CNN televised debate and we can have the post debate commentaries by Lady Gaga and the Teletubbies and why not? Americans would complain for 2 days and then buy the latest Asterix Comic for voting advice on the next election. - 2361
The economy is in shambles. Unemployment is at an all-time high. Foreclosure has become an epidemic and we are looking to the same screw-up's who put us in this mess to get us out.
Seriously, and I say this with all due respect the handicapped and economically disadvantaged, we would have a better chance of grabbing a random homeless, blind, deaf, mute, quadriplegic out of a refrigerator box shanty in a west Philly alleyway and betting one million dollars that we could train him to win the Ironman in a week, than we ever will depending on succubus congressmen and senators to get us out of this mess of which they are responsible.
Congress will blame this meltdown on aliens and the chupacabra before they admit any wrong doing.
Turn on the news and you'll see an orgy of sweaty brow, finger-wagging and jaw-flapping politicians blaming a straw man CEO of an investment banking firm for ten years of his firm's economic gluttony and purging (though he's only been in this executive position for 90 days). It's a set up. Wake up. It's all just a distraction.
Bring in a clean cut yet power hungry executive, put him through rapid promotion from VP to CEO, tell him he's going to a press conference then blindfold him, lead him to a 3x3 ft closet, toss in a dozen stink bombs, 10 day old soiled adult diapers, bottle rockets and fire crackers, turn out the lights, take off the blindfold, throw in a rabid squirrel, slam the door shut and 5 days later let him out to and ask him to run the Boston Marathon wearing an eye patch, Speedo and flip-flops while waving pompoms. Let's get real. We need solutions, not a congressional Kid n' Play dance competition. It's a joke and we are the ones being laughed at; you, me and our children.
I have an idea! For the next presidential election we can have Pee Wee Herman run under the democratic ticket, the hunchback of notre dame can run under the republican ticket and we can have Chubaka run the CNN televised debate and we can have the post debate commentaries by Lady Gaga and the Teletubbies and why not? Americans would complain for 2 days and then buy the latest Asterix Comic for voting advice on the next election. - 2361
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posted by Marcondes Allen at 12:24 AM
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